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Godiva's Hymn

Revision as of 23:15, 13 October 2016 by Malcolmmcc (talk | contribs)

Godiva's Hymn is the classic chant. Used by Engineers and engineering students across the globe, it's a time honoured tradition. McGill has a few of their own modifications we think are worth checking out.

Make sure to check out our other chants

Godiva's Hymm

Verses About Godiva

Godiva was a lady who through Coventry did ride,
To show all of the villagers her lovely bare white hide;
The most observant villager, an Engineer of course,
Was the only to notice that Godiva rode a horse.

I've come a long, long way she said, and I will go as far
With the man who takes me off this horse, and leads me to a bar.
The men who took her off her steed, and stood her to a beer,
Were a blear- eyed Surveyor, and a drunken Engineer.

Godiva woke next morning and she had an awful head,
Decided to be sensible and spend the day in bed.
The only ones to visit her and bring her lots of cheer,
Were a broken-down Surveyor and a bloodshot Engineer.

Godiva was a lady well-endowed, of that there was no doubt.
She never wore a stich of clothes, just wound her hair about.
The first man who ever made her was an Engineer of course,
But an Artsie queer, on just one beer once made Godiva's horse.

Godiva died and where she fell a benchmark marks the spot,
In any Engineering text, its level can be got.
And up in Heaven, everyday Godiva craves for beer,
But she'll have to wait until the gates let in the Engineers



Female Verses

We are, we are, we are, we are the female Engineers,
We can, we can, we can, we can demolish twice as many beers.
So cum, so cum, so cum, so cum, so cum all over us,
For we don't give a damn about any damn man that can't get it up for us.

A firehose by day and forty beers by night,
An engineer may never sleep but still stay just as bright,
And if you ever ask her how she keeps up her routine,
She'll raise her trust can of Jolt, smile and say 'Caffeine!'

A man sat in a tavern with a lovely looking lass
And stared when for the nineteenth time she raised and drank her glass
"You've out-drunk four strong men, and half the bar my dear"
The maiden smiled sweetly, said "I'm an Engineer!"

I happened once upon a maid whose eyes were full of fire,
Her physical endowments would make your hands perspire,
She shocked us when she told us that she never had been kissed,
For her boyfriend was a worn-out Engineering Scientist.

At the Arts Quad at our school there are many untruths told
'bout how female engineers are frigid, strange, and cold,
But truth be told men look for lady engineers of course,
And sleep with girls who study friction, motion, stress and force.



Verses about Other Faculties

An Artsman and an Engineer once found a gallon can,
Said the Artsman, "Match me drink for drink as long as you can stand."
They drank three drinks, the Artsman fell, his face was turning green.
But the Engineer drank on and said; "It's only gasoline."

An Artsman and an Engineer were stranded on a boat,
The max capacity was one, the dam thing would not float,
The Engineer flipped a coin to settle the dispute,
But the coin fell in the water and the Artsie gave pursuit.

A wide-eyed Artsie Chemist and a Chemical Engineer,
Were formulating molecule equations over beer.
Each drank a glass of water, but the Artsie hit the floor,
For what he thought was H2O was H2SO4.

So now you’ve heard our story and you know we are the Engineers,
And when we all shall graduate, we’ll all have great careers.
An Engineer’s starting wage can pull in 60 G’s,
While an Artsie with a PHD can work at Mickey D’s.



Verses About Other Schools

The guys from Queen's they get the girls - you know it that's a fact.
It's not the way they part their hair, or in the way they act.
It 'cause they're such good lovers, with that extra special touch,
For you've got to be so skillful when you fuck the sheep so much.

An Engineering from U of T once found the gates of Hell,
He looked the Devil in the eye and said; "You're looking well."
The Devil looked at him and said; "Why have you come to me?"
For you've been to hell already, since you went to U of T.

I'd rather be an Red Man than a fucking bumble bee,
I'd rather be a genius than flip burgers at McD's,
I wouldn't wipe my ass with a Concordia Degree,
So fuck you bumble bees, fuck you!



Version Française

Nous sommes, nous sommes, nous sommes, nous sommes les ingénieurs français
Quand on a fini de boire la bière, on sort le Bourgolais
On boit sans fin, on fait la fête et les filles nous adorent
Rien de mieux que la langue française pour stimuler un corps.

Politically Correct Verse

We are, we are, we are, we are, we are the Engineers,
We can, we can, we can, we fix anything with gears.
We work real hard, we play real hard, so come along with us,
For we don't give a damn for any damn man, who don't give a damn for us.

Pub Crawl Verse

We're lost, we're lost, we're lost, we're lost, we don't know where we are,
We came, we came, we came, we came, we came to find a bar.
Don't come, don't come, don't come, don't come, don't come along with us,
For we don't know where the hell we are but fuck we're on a bus!

Verses about Engineering

Professors put demands on us, they say we have to tool,
But all we want to do is sleep, we hate this fucking school.
You can bitch or tell us off, abuse us if you please,
But we're all set to graduate, and all we need are C's!



Other

The Army and the Navy boys went out to have some fun,
Down at the local tavern where the fiery liquors run.
But all they found were empties for the Engineers had come,
And traded all their instruments for gallon jugs of rum.

Now Venus is a statue made entirely of stone.
There's not a fig leaf on her, she's as naked as a bone.
On noticing her arms were broke an Engineer discoursed,
Why the damn things busted concrete and it must be reinforced.

After reading Karma Sutra, a boy learned position nine.
For proving masculinity, it truly was divine.
But then one day the girl rebelled and threw him on is rear,
For he was but an Artsy and she an Engineer.

My father was a miner from the Northern Malamute,
My mother was a mistress in a house of ill repute.
They kicked me out at a tender age, not shedding any tears,
And said; "To McGill you son-of-a-gun, and join the Engineers!"

Now Caesar went to Egypt at the age of fifty-three,
But Cleopatra's blood was red, her heart was young and free,
And every night when Julius said goodnight at three o'clock,
There was a Roman Engineer just waiting 'round the block.

My mother peddles opium and my fathers on the dole.
My sister used to walk the streets, but now she's on parole.
My brother runs a restaurant with bedrooms in the rear,
But they won't even speak to me 'cause I'm an Engineer.

A Drunken Engineer once staggered through the Roddick gates,
He stumbled through the lecture hall so drunk and very late.
The only thing that held him up and kept him on his course,
Were the boundary conditions and the electromotive force.

The army and the navy boys set out to have some fun,
Down at the local tavern where the fiery liquids run.
But all they found were empties, for the Engineers had come,
And traded all their instruments for gallon jugs of rum.

A maiden and an Engineer were sitting in the park,
The Engineer were busy doing research after dark.
His scientific method was a marvel to observe,
While his right hand wrote the figures, his left hand traced the curves.

Sir Francis Drake and all his ships set out for Calais Bay,
They heard the Spanish Rum Fleet was headed up that way,
But the Engineers had beat them by a night and half a day,
Though they were gassed completely, you still could hear them say…

Elvis is a legend he's the King of Rock'n Roll
But the life that he was leading - well, it finally took its toll.
So then one day, he realized, he chose the wrong career,
So he faked his death to join us and now he's an Engineer.

I happened once upon a maid whose eyes were full of fire.
Her physical endowments would have made your hands perspire.
She shocked me when she told me that she never had been kissed,
For her boyfriend was a tiered Engineering Physicist.

Now you've heard our story and you know we're Engineers,
And like all jolly fellows, we can down our whisky clear,
We drink to every other guy who comes from far and near,
'Cause we're all a hell, a hell, a hell, a hell, of an Engineer.

Rapunzel let her hair down for two suitors down below,
So one of them could grab a hold and give the old heave-ho
The prince began to climb at once, but soon came out the worst,
For the Engineer rode up a lift, and reached Rapunzel first.