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Consent

Consent is when someone agrees, gives permission, or says "yes" to sexual activity with other persons. Consent is always freely given and all people in a sexual situation must feel that they are able to say "yes" or "no" or stop the sexual activity at any point.

Consent must be:

Made explicit. This can look like asking ("Can I do this?"), or having a special word or physical signal that acts as an affirmative "yes." Assuming that consent is present just because someone doesn't say "no" is not enough
Mutual. This means everyone involved must agree to what's going on.
Continuous. This means that someone can stop or change their mind at any time. Consent should be attained throughout, this can be checking in ("Is this still ok?").
For every act. Just because someone said yes to one thing, it does not mean that they have consented to anything else.


Consent cannot be given:

  • If there is any kind of physical, emotional, or verbal force
  • If there is manipulation ("You're so beautiful, I thought we were close")
  • If there is coercion/pressure ("Everyone is having sex, just do it")
  • If there is a power imbalance. Consent can't be given when one person has more power than the other person. It is the ability to manipulate or be manipulated through the unequal power dynamic resting within the relationship. It is an unspoken obligation, where the unbalanced dynamic acts as leverage to limit access and/or ability